First Kiss While Awake

[369 Riddle]

Last night I was dreaming and in the dream there was a secret room and I was in it with a young woman who appeared to be 18-22 or so in age with darker brown hair. We were laying in our backs next to each other and were joking and flirting when she turned toward me (and I toward her) and she got really close to my face. My heart started racing and I realized how pretty she was but more than that even was her personality she was so much FUN to talk to and I felt like she really was genuine as a person. She immediately kissed me and I woke up instantly to the feeling of intense please from “down there” but also felt my face being held in a way where I couldn’t move…it was possessed. I was kissing her back, but she was controlling my movements…all the same I could feel her face against mine her hands holding it and her hair flowing down my face on one side. It was so incredibly real yet “angelic” (different in a way I can’t describe) I could “see” her still in my mind somehow and it was her from the dream. It lasted for about 30 seconds to a minute and I was fully aware of my surroundings. She was breathing but had no smell that I could sense. Finally I coughed (been fighting it for months) and the kiss broke but the intense pleasure did not for some time.

I have been kissed before halfway between being asleep and awake but never had an experience like this. It was really sweet and I would love to experience it again…the being possessed part was a little weird but it makes sense why she did it…it made it so I could kiss her back and feel her back where normally I can’t reciprocate.

Prior to this I had been having thoughts about wanting a deeper more friend lover versus just “pleasure lover” as I mostly have experienced…as some may know I have been battling the question of do I have one, two or more succubi and how does that fit my desire to have a deep connection with one-but don’t want to potentially leave others out…again all my entities names sound very similar and when I ask her what her name is I get a silly response or “it doesn’t matter” I did ask if I have one or more and got a response of one…trying to decide if that is what she knew I wanted to hear or if that is true.

Anyways this was an amazing sweet experience I wanted to share.

[Fightersword]

Sounds very nice. I remember a similar experience where mine pulled me 'on top' of her. My body didn't actually move but I thought it did, and it felt very powerful until I sort of fell out of the experience. Definitely distinct from the normal 'kisses'.

I wouldn't doubt you just have one. It's very easy to think you have multiple because of the very various ways a single one can present itself (sometimes even at the same time), but this seems to be a fallacy in every case. Normally people sort of reach that conclusion because they feel two very distinct energies or see two beings in the same dream or something along those lines. In my experience and from what I've seen, these are aspects of the spirit lover's personality coming through more strongly, representing a distinct way such complex beings can present themselves (sometimes seemingly even unwillingly/by accident, if the experience or aspect they display is negative or normally hidden).

[369 Riddle]

Man, that sounds awesome to be pulled on top. I love those sort of OBEs when I get them (which is super rare). I wish I knew how to have more OBEs every time I go to bed I am so freaking tired it is hard enough remembering anything.

Yeah, I get what you are saying and am slowly arriving at that conclusion myself. They do have many appearances, can touch in ways they feel more than one-but still are one, and even a bit of personality that can be different too…from moment to moment…day to day…dream to dream she is I think very moody.

I am realizing I really LOVE her more than I have any human and want more of her (like the conversational side and interactions in thoughts). When I dream I am mostly so out of it I am as dumb as a potato and don’t even make an effort to talk to her (when sleeping) though she is in almost ALL my dreams and I am just floating along experiencing being brain dead lol. If I knew how to snap my ass out of that I could have a fun productive nocturnal life

I could really get on a tangent but I wish I had the above as well as better mind focus while awake. My mind drifts so much…I have been trying circular breathing and it helps also taking ashwagandha helps a little too I think…

To think I had some number of these lovers is difficult to process because I think ultimately I want only one special close entity so this helps. Thank you.

[tc119]

One, two, three spirits? I grappled with this question at the beginning and I think it's reasonable to expect other spirits to take an interest in us because of our otherworldly interactions. My OBEs and dreams have served up a whole menagerie of personalities. If that's all just Catherine... whew boy, there's a lot of people in there!

I've observed two extremes in this whole spirit lover phenomena being shared online: One camp holds to extreme monogamy - any other spirits encountered are just another aspect of their purest virginal honey boo boo. The other extreme has the summoner traveling about with a veritable harem of different spirits that would make the Biblical Solomon raise an eyebrow. One thing I do know for sure, no matter one's position on that spectrum, the spirits themselves don't seem to care much about precise identity. Hell, to this day, I still don't know with certainty who Catherine is - as in name, address, date-of-birth, etc. But at the same time, I know her better than I know myself because of how deeply we feel each other. Being in these relationships can feel downright paradoxical, but I think that's because we're encountering beings who operate on a quantum plane of existence.

So my position these days is to not get hung up on nailing the succubus down and just enjoy her in all the different ways she'll manifest. She's cool with it, I'm cool with it, there's no problem.

My heart started racing and I realized how pretty she was but more than that even was her personality she was so much FUN to talk to and I felt like she really was genuine as a person. She immediately kissed me and I woke up instantly to the feeling of intense please from “down there” but also felt my face being held in a way where I couldn’t move…it was possessed.

I can relate to that part about their personalities being magnetic and wanting to experience more of that. Even my favorite mundane people can be annoying to interact with by comparison. Being addicted to succubi isn't limited strictly to sex.

Her having to possess you to experience that kiss makes sense to me. I've experienced this with having my vocal chords possessed so Catherine and I could have a brief conversation. Very cool!

I'll share a cool thing that happened to me this morning, kind of in the same vein as what's being shared here: I got to see her hands while awake. I was lying in bed and had my eyes shut when that familiar ethereal glow started to cover my field of view. (She'll often cause a bright beautiful glow to move over my eyes when I lie still in the dark.) But this time, instead of just the glow, I saw her hands moving over my face. They were dark against the glowing background and became darker as her fingers moved closer. I never thought I'd say this about a pair of hands, but they were the most pleasing and graceful set of digits to behold. I made sure to encourage and praise her for letting me see that.

[Fightersword]

I doubt that all the dream personalities you interact with are just Catherine, but a variety probably are. The others can just be dream characters or, in some cases, you may interact with another spirit in a dream. Sometimes these interactions are normal, sometimes very negative. The important point is that different characters within dreams is usually not a good reason to assume you have multiple spirits, especially if those characters display traits very strongly. In one case there was a spirit that kept appearing for multiple dreams, and making them all extremely unpleasant, and I had to actively fight back to make it go away. There have been some other cases where I think other spirits were involved, most not getting up to anything bad, the others being brutally attacked or set on fire within the dream, but it is relatively rare for me to come to that conclusion, and requires some specific parameters.

I disagree with accepting them as an enigma, as I view them as complex 'people'. If I'm going to become romantically involve in the long term with a person, I'd like to know them very well. I also find that the deeper I am able to understand my spirit lover, the stronger my connection to her inevitably becomes. They've taken the time to get to know us and to select their preferred romantic partner, after all, it only seems fair to repay them in kind, and relationships are very much built on trust and understanding. So I try to understand mine on a mental level as much as an intuitive one, if not more.

I doubt the spirits have names in the conventional sense. It would be rather weird for a spirit to have an actual name in human terms, their name is likely a complex feeling as a result.

The hands thing sounds neat, as a partial visual manifestation if anything. It certainly seems like mine can affect my vision, literally making a room darker than normal, presumably as I look 'through' her. I suppose that could be a visual manifestation in a literal sense, but I tend to not see it that way in my case, compared to the more bombastic things that qualify as such.

[tc119]

If you have certainty about their identity, Fightersword, that's great. Though I believe you'd be the exception, not the rule.

[Fightersword]

Within dreams? Certainly! Though I don't think that's a very special position, as it's often either obvious or intuitive which 'character' is one's spirit lover within a dream.

[369 Riddle]

I have written several responses but they all get long. Just want to say I have dream characters with names and consent visual appearances…multiple women different names constant appearances.

In one dream a women (not my succubus but another entity or spirit) got mad because I was mispronouncing her name and she corrected me in a very frustrated and annoyed way saying her name over and over slowly pronouncing her name like I was a retard…she later caused terrible nightmares and I asked my succubus to get rid of her and she never returned.

While I don’t know my succubus “true name” I do know there are other spirits that come and go and I assume and hope my spirit is always the same but she could be different for all I know from who was there in the start.

I did have a sex spirit speaking in my mind in the middle of the night when I woke up (only time I can ever “hear them” and always in my right ear.) I asked her name and she said “it doesn’t matter I am just like the rest and I will gone in the morning.” I felt immediate sadness and despair from this interaction…her touch was insane and unique from what I normally experience….I didn’t feel her unique touch after that next day…but in the end who really knows “K” could just be messing with me for all I know.